Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
