I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
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