One girl and one boy is just not enough.
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
