your thong is hanging out like whoa
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
