Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
