my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
