I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
