nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
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