when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
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