For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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