Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
