Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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