Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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