Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
