Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
