your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
