Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
