This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
