Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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