It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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