just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
im holly from the hills drunk
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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