You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
