I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize