you traded sex for a burrito?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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