Me too!
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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