Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize