Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
