My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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