If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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