IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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