So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
