I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
