ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
