UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
