Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
