I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
