I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize