I wanna bring you to show and tell
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
