Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
