Your tits are I can't wait for
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
