i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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