you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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