I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
