Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize