i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Randomize