I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
