Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Randomize
