idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
