Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
