So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
